What greater witness can you have than from God?

I’ve learned so much this week. I guess that’s the coolest thing about life is that if you live it well, you improve every day.

I was totally burnt out by the time Friday came along. I super love being with these students though. They are so wonderful. I think it’s a true gift from heaven to see people the way God sees them. I pray every day that I will see his children as he does and then maybe I can help aid them in reaching and seeing it too.

Friday I was sitting at my desk wondering if I was really cut out for this.Then the next period I got 2 “Happy Grams” from 2 of my students saying how happy they were to have me and how nice I was. It was a testimony to me that I can make an impact and still be sweet and kind. When it's necessary I can be firm. My mentor teacher even says I have a good poker face. Never thought I’d ever hear someone tell me that.

I still miss my mission a lot, but I was talking with a guy on Friday who’s been back from his mission for a few years and he told me that he still misses it, but he wouldn’t want to go back to it forever. He said his life has gotten even better every year since then. He said he would love to just have one more day as a missionary, just to live it again. But, that brought me a lot of comfort. I know life will just keep getting better. There are so many possibilities.

I went to “The Lamb of God” performed by one of the YSA stakes here. It was amazing!!! It really was one of the most spiritual experiences of my life. I realized there that the spirituality I was feeling there is what we’re striving for. I went to a dance Friday night and I thought how wonderful it was to dance again and I thought it was the best thing ever. I was reminded at the show last night that no other joy can ever be compared to the joy I feel when the spirit is with me and tells me that Christ loves me and that because He condescended and lived and died and lives again, so will I. That love brings a joy past understanding and nothing compares to it.

I’m so grateful for Jesus Christ and that He will never give up on us. His life and Atonement are proof of that. Sister Summerhays had this song on a CD and I’ll never forget it. It’s about a young man who is wondering if throughout all his life God has really been there and really cares. I know we’ve all had a time when we’ve wondered this. Look around you and see the evidence and feel it. Let his spirit come to you and you will know. You may not be able to explain how, but you’ll feel it.

We can feel it like in D&C 6:22-23 “If you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your, heart that you might know concerning the truth of these things. Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from God?”

God is there. Christ lives. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is the restored church. Read the Book of Mormon and tell me if it isn't true.

Here's that song. Aaron Edson- "Wondering"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSEfuXaqiBc

Happy Birthday Mom--Emulating God's love

I have learned a lot this week. It seems an everyday occurrence that I plead before my Father for comfort and guidance. Sometimes I think I have an idea of what I want my life to be like, but I know that God knows much better than I do. This world can be so confusing. Without the guidance from the Lord, with Christ as my anchor, I could never feel the peace I feel amidst so much darkness.

Josette’s become my best girl friend here and she has such good advice. Her and Glenn are so wonderful and I can’t get over how much Heavenly Father must love me to continue to take care of me by placing the perfect people in my life at the perfect time. Last night we were talking about how we have no idea about what the future would hold and how nice it would be if the Lord just told us what would happen. As hard as I may think it is to never truly know what will happen, I’m so grateful I don’t. It shows Heavenly Father’s true love for us that He doesn’t try to make everything easy for us.

I’m so grateful for my mother because ever since I was little she taught me what I would need to know so that one day I could do it on my own. She knew that there would come a day when she could no longer always be there for me. She wanted me to not only survive without her guidance, she wanted me to excel and become all she is. She has developed in such a way that it’s evident that she walks with the Lord. Today is one of the greatest days in the year because it is the anniversary of the day that such a wondrous spirit entered this world. I don’t know why I was so fortunate to be born to this amazing woman, but not a day goes by I don’t thank the Lord for allowing me to be cultivated by her. Her example has helped me to see and understand the Lord’s love for me.

When I got off the plane after my mission and walked around the corner, I saw down the hall past security, my mother and family and friends waiting for me. The instant my mom saw me she started to run. I’ll never forget her almost getting tackled by security, but the tears in her eyes when we embraced were the greatest homecoming I could have received. To know I am so loved by such a beloved woman is humbling and inspiring. I am anxious to experience the homecoming I will receive at the end of this life when I see my beloved Father again—both of them.

While I know only 3 others are so fortunate to have such an amazing mother as mine, I know we all have a Heavenly Father who loves us so much, even more than my wonderful mother loves me. I can hardly comprehend my mother’s love. I have no comprehension for the love God has for me, but I know it’s what keeps the universe alive. His love is in everything. “God is love” (1 John 4:8)

I still have no idea what the future holds, but I do know that as I do the little things, feasting on my scriptures, praying constantly, immersing myself in church, I will find that I am always on the right path and I will end up in a glorious circumstance, which I cannot now imagine, but which I know is worth any sacrifice to obtain.

I saw this Mormon Message yesterday, "A Secure Anchor," and once again I felt the spirit calm and bring peace to my soul. We all climb mountains, many of the same level of difficulty, but with the gospel and with the Savior, the difficulty is lessened. (Matt 11:28-29.) Why try to do it alone when you have a divine being pleading to help you? We are creatures born with free agency. The greatest challenge you and I will have is to submit that one greatest gift to the Lord. That act is the beginning of the transformation from man to God—to love. Think about what that means. Do you believe that God is love? Do you believe the sacrifice of His son was His greatest manifestation of that love? (1 John 4:9-10.)

I testify that our purpose is to become like Him. Our purpose is to become beings capacitated with eternal love. Give yourself to Him. You will never know the supernal joys you are designed to experience until you do. I promise that once you do so, you will never regret it, but will pray in humility and gratitude everyday of your life for His grand love for you.

I love teaching. It’s exhausting, more exhausting than anything I’ve done. But I love the students. I’ve been grading all of their pre-assessment papers and I just love how much of them comes out in their writing that you don’t get in class. It’s like their spirits come out more. These kids have some hard lives: from divorce, to worrying about food in the house, relatives and friends dying, worrying about being too big or too small. They all just need the gospel and God’s love. I know that I can’t preach that, but I can be a light of hope and happiness in their lives and make it so at least their Jr year of English will be a bright spot in their lives and hopefully inspire them to see their potential and reach it.

I’m loving my YSA ward, I’ve made a lot of friends and am so grateful that with God’s kingdom on earth, you always have a family wherever you go. I got a pretty scary calling today, but I can’t tell you till next week!

I did go to the temple this week. I really needed some peace, so Tuesday, Glenn and Josette took me. The Mesa temple is exquisite. All of them are. I will never get over the amazing feeling in the temple. I will never understand everything in this life, but I will do everything in my power to understand what I can and to live worthily so I can always feel that feeling in the temple. There is nothing of greater value than my temple recommend. That unlocks the door to heaven. I plead with everyone to do whatever it takes that you may experience for yourselves the joy I am speaking of. That is your destiny, to be in the presence of God forever.

I love life, God is great, and every day is a lifetime opportunity.

Here's a link to the Mormon Message I was referring to. 

http://www.lds.org/pages/mormon-messages

Be Still My Soul

I love that feeling you get when you know you are doing what the Lord wants you to do. It’s been hard to find myself again these last few weeks, but this week I really found myself again. The first day of teaching I felt happier beyond description. It’s been quite the journey for me to figure out what God wants me to do. I’m sure everyone has wondered at some point if the path they are on is really what the Lord wants for them, even though you may only be there because at some point you thought you were listening to God. I remember when I first switched my major to teaching and the huge leap of faith that was, but how I knew that was what He wanted me to do. Yet there are times when I forget that and I wonder “what am I doing?” I had a few of those the last couple of weeks, but the assurance from the spirit was stronger than the doubts from the adversary. Walking down the halls on Wednesday, my first day of teaching, I felt a sense of peace wash over me like I had been praying for.  For you RM’s you know the first while home are not easy. Wednesday was the first day I didn’t cry since coming home from my mission. It was like all of a sudden eveything felt right again. Every time I feel the spirit guide me, I hear in my mind "Be still my soul" and it came on my first day teaching. In a high school hall I could feel the Lord tell me I was where I needed to be.

I read something from Boyd K. Packer that stuck with me. Life is great, but the last couple of weeks have been the greatest in many ways, but also the hardest I’ve ever experienced. He said:

“Teach our members that if they have a good, miserable day once in a while, or several in a row, to stand steady and face them. Things will straighten out. There is great purpose in our struggle in life. There is great meaning in these words entitled ‘The Lesson’

Yes, my fretting,

Frowning child,

I could cross

The room to you

More easily.

But I’ve already

Learned to walk,

So I make you

Come to me.

Let go now

There!

You see?

Oh, remember

This simple lesson,

Child,

And when

In later years

You cry out

With tight fists

And tears

“Oh, help me,

God—please.”

Just listen

And you’ll hear

A silent voice:

“I would, child,

I would.

But it’s you,

Not I,

Who needs to try

Godhood.”

I love that so much. If you have time you should watch the mormon message about the currant bush. A lady in Joseph City showed it to us today and I think it applies.
http://www.mormonchannel.org/mormon-channel-daily/213?v=1839005837001

I wish I could tell you all about my amazing week. I was able to go back to Joseph City and it was so rejuvenating. I love that little town. It feels like home to me and everyone there is like my family. I’d like to close this though with my testimony of the scriptures and the power of comfort they bring. Every time I read I feel all better.

“Remember that soothing, calming effect of reading the scriptures. Next time you are where they are read, notice how things settle down. Sense the feeling of peace and security that comes.”

God is real. He is our Father. And with faith we can do all things. Trust in Him and give up everything to Him. I promise He will always fulfill and leave you richer and happier than anything else.


My new name tag... Not quite the same, but I hope I can make a difference all the same. I still got Christ's written on my heart.

A God of Miracles

I heard a girl in church today say in her testimony, “When we put God

first, He does provide a way for us.” When I heard that, everything in my head fit together. I’m sure no one can believe that I would be feeling overwhelmed after all the change that’s been going on. I can hardly even believe how life has changed and all that has happened in the last 2 weeks, but it has and that I can’t argue with. All I’ve been able to do is just keep believing that if I’m putting God first then everything will work out. Back in like April I was facing the decision to stay with the plan I’d had to student teach, or to put it off for awhile and take a break when I got home. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I asked for a blessing. In it I wasn’t told exactly what to do, but I was told that if I just serve the Lord that everything will work out. I decided to just trust in that. I kept the original plan and it seemed that things were working out. I know my mother went through a lot to make everything work, for which I am so grateful, but nevertheless the Lord has seen fit that, once again, I am taken care of. I know that all that has taken place is nothing short of a miracle, but only because I put it all in the Lord’s hand.

I’m so grateful for the reprieve I was able to receive for the last 2 weeks before starting my student teaching. Those couple of weeks are days I will cherish forever. Since coming to Mesa, I have seen how the Lord has truly been taking care of me, not because I am more special than anyone else, but I know it’s because I have sought his will and done his will and he has not, and will not, fail me. Everything’s happened so fast that it wasn’t until today when I was sitting in sacrament meeting, my first time back in a YSA ward, that I realized what a big risk I had taken in coming here and how if it wasn’t for the Lord, it would not have worked out. The people I am living with are like angels from heaven. They are so kind and treat me like their daughter. When I got home Mom and I were trying to figure out which of the many living options I had that I should take. She had called the Bishop of the area around my high school and asked if he knew of any one that could take me in. I met him last night and he said that he was surprised he was able to find something that worked, that it was a miracle. I learned today that the name of the street I live on, Milagro, means miracle. I thought that was just perfect. My life really has been a miracle. None of this could have worked out if it wasn’t for my trusting in the Lord and putting him first and him providing.

Many of you have probably seen the Mormon Message called “Courage.” It’s about Queen Esther. Well, I said this last time, but I feel like saying it again. One of the woman says of her experience in trusting the Lord and taking a leap of faith to quit her job, not sure how things would turn out, but knowing she had to stick to her standards that, “We don’t know what the Lord is trying to teach us, but if I really trust Heavenly Father it really doesn’t matter what we don’t understand.”

I’ve never known why the Lord wanted me to come to Mesa, but I’ve always known it was where I needed to go. My mentor teacher is so kind and I’m so excited to work with him. The faculty at the school is incredible.  The people I hung out with over the weekend were so fun and kind. I have learned that the students here are way low in their writing scores, so our goal as teachers is to come up with ways on how we can improve that. I am so excited because I love writing! I want these kids to know that if you can think, then you can write. I’m thrilled to be here and hope with all my heart I can make a difference for these kids.  

God is real. He is there to guide us. His constancy is something on which we can rely. If you’re following him, you have no need o fear, everything will always work out and your life will be a living miracle.

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths for good” (Prov 3:5-6).

Just like the Liahona that I talked about last week, which worked to lead the way only according to their obedience and faith, so shall our lives be guided and full of miracles as we obey the Lord without always having to know why.

“And it did work for them according to their faith in God; therefore, if they had faith to believe that God could cause that those spindles should point the way they should go, behold, it was done; therefore they had this miracle, and also many other miracles wrought by the power of God, day by day” (Alma 37:40).
Everything in the gospel always comes back to the very first principle--faith. Missionaries are taught to act with faith . Often they are "led by the spirit not knowing beforehand the things that they should do" (1 Nephi 4:6). I don't know about you, but I feel like that is how my life's always been. Not knowing why, sometimes being a little scared, but then my faith comes in brighter and somehow conquers the fear and as I act, everything is always okay. It's funny how only not being set apart as a missionary for a week how much harder it seems to share the gospel. I'm still used to trying to talk to everyone, but it seems like I can't always bring up the gospel. Then afterwards I'll be like, "I should have said...." I was talking with a friend about that and I realized that is why it's so important that we study scriptures daily, pray constantly, and listen to the spirit always. Already I have seen the affect of how media and the world can affect me spiritually. I miss the missionary lifestyle, the sanctification of that life. I'm sick of not uplifting music, degrading conversation, or pointless use of time. I know there's a balance and I'm working to find it, since the YSA's have activities planned everyday, I know fun is something God wants us to have, but not the way the world thinks. I realize now though just what we as missionaries are asking the members to do. Sharing the gospel is not easy. For missionaries, God steps in major to assist them. But, I know that can happen for anyone, if we put our trust in the Lord, He will lead us and we will feel at peace every night with our offering to him that day. My goal is to share the gospel with at least 5 people this week. That seems like nothing compared to what we did as missionaries, but considering the amount of people I've shared it with so far, that's a pretty good goal. Just imagine though if every member shared the gospel with just 5 people a week? That's a beautiful picture. It all comes down to faith. Trust in God and let miracles happen in your life, day by day.

Josette and Glen Hakes with me. They are amazing!